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Old 06-06-2007, 10:35 PM
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Hello,

Here is a postcard my designer and I are working on.

I like the general layout -- I am not yet completely sold on the wording on it. I would love to hear your comments - it would help ignite some ideas for me.
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Old 06-06-2007, 10:49 PM
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Are there lawns that only part of a family can enjoy?

I hate when marketing pieces have quotes around statements that aren't attributed to anyone. Lose the quotes - there's no need for them.

Otherwise, I like it a lot.
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Old 06-06-2007, 11:27 PM
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If you're trying to look like a big player you succeded.

Good news...looks professional.

Bad news...it would hit the garbage in a second. Unless I was looking for a lawn service.
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Old 06-07-2007, 09:43 AM
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ditto Jeff's sentiments... lose the quotes. Also, I'm not sure I like the first selling point on the right... "Highest Quality Materials". What does that mean?

Looks good otherwise.
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Old 06-07-2007, 02:10 PM
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If you are always on site you might want to say "owner on site" instead of "owner operated".
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Old 06-07-2007, 11:11 PM
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personally, the large amount of Gold does not sit well with me. I understand where it comes from yet I think there is too much of it. I think JW hit it.
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Old 06-07-2007, 11:19 PM
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Thanks for al the good comments.

I agree with The quotes.

JW: Tell em more about what you mean -- unless you are looking for a lawn service. If you aren't -- then Why would I want you to keep it?


I also agree with highest quality materials as a selling point. She took a few statements I had given her and tried to make them into bullets that would fit -- that one did not work.
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Old 06-08-2007, 08:13 PM
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Having the head line over the picture is is no good. Peoples eyese are always go right to the photo then move downward. Most people will never read the headline if its above the picture.


I recommened reading all the books written by David Ogilvy.
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Old 06-10-2007, 12:55 AM
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Jeff, I think possibly what JW was getting at is that there really is no incentive for other companies' clients to switch to you. At least that is my take. With this material, you are only going to be getting people making a new purchase, not switching providers. Given this and the time of year, I do not think this piece will be terribly successful in terms of response rates.
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